Mental Health: Same Issues, New Words Over Time

Recently I was walking around Barnes and Noble Bookstore and looking at the categories and titles of books. There were seven major sections of books that I could see: Health and Wellness, Cooking, Fitness, History, Finance, Psychology, and Religion.  I am amazed at how many books have been written to help us with our mental health. Of all those categories, five of them relate directly to mental health and how to improve our lives in some way.  I was imagining all the books written through the ages that weren't even on the bookshelves, but can be accessed electronically or in libraries.

Over the years, the field of Psychology comes up with new terms for the same issues. Here are some of them.
1980's  Self-Esteem
1990's  Positivity & Meditation
2000's  Self-Help
2010's  Self-Care and Mindfulness

Mental Health is an ageless issue in every culture. While we know that genetics, environment, spiritual mindset and personality all play a part in people's mental health (we are all on a spectrum!), no one has a magic answer to recovery, but collectively, we can narrow down remedies to some common things. Things that we know help improve mental health in various combinations:
A good diet, outdoor time in the sun, exercise, spirituality, medication (for some), counseling, de-stressing (taking yourself out of situations that cause stress- when possible), setting long term goals, and getting the required recommended amount of sleep.

Working with teenagers who have mental health issues, I am amazed at how many of them are already living poor lifestyles at their young ages. Most of them definitely are not getting enough sleep, they eat a terrible diet of french fries and hamburgers or chicken fingers several times a week, and rarely do they exercise once they have completed PE requirements. I personally think PE should be required every semester until graduation.  This is a major mental health booster!

It is definitely frustrating that students don't take care of themselves, and no matter how much advice I give them, I don't see major improvements in the short term. I spend a lot of time helping kids get across the finish line of K-12 education, and then I have to shoo them out the door and start over with the next generation.

I would say that over the years, I have found that pursuing relationships with kids and letting them know we care as counselors is the best we can do, while equipping them with tools and exposing them to opportunities that are out there after graduation. I believe that every connection helps them connect brain cells, and I want them to look back on high school and remember that someone cared, even if they don't remember my name!

A Letter to My Dad From a Student in Foster Care

I was speaking recently to one of my students who is in a foster care placement. She had a visit with her mom and dad about a month ago. Both of her parents are addicted to meth and have been in and out of jail. They are currently out of jail and she claims they continue to do meth. The visit she had did not go well. They are allowed to be in public places together, but unsupervised. The student believed that her dad was high during the visit. On a different day, he came into her place of employment and got high in the restroom so he was asked not to return to that place.  She shared with me a text she sent him and I thought it was very well written and showed her feelings appropriately. (Please note, the incident was reported her her Family Case Manager from the Department of Child Services)

I wanted to post this because it shows the raw feelings of a student who has dealt with a (short) lifetime of pain, and of parents who cared more about their additions than their children. Getting help for additions takes courage, and if someone really wants to get help, they will admit themselves to a facility- maybe insurance doesn't cover everything, but if they are court ordered and in the system, it will get paid for one way or another! Many teenagers go off the deep end with parents like hers, but she has goals and there are kids out there who break the cycle of their parents.

Child Maltreatment Report Indicates Kentucky and Indiana as WORST States for Child Abuse

Why? Why is there child abuse in the first place? Why do I live in a state that has the second highest child abuse rate in the country? We don't even have one of the largest cities in the United States! These are questions with complicated answers. There is so much evil in some people's hearts- evil that they sometimes have little control over due to deep addictions to drugs or a mental illness they can't seem to overcome, even for the sake of children.

April is child abuse awareness month and I always make a post to bring the topic to light. The blue ribbon is both a symbol of Child Abuse Awareness and Autism Awareness.  More often than not, long term effects of child abuse results in mental disorders of children or deviant behavior, and the cycle is rarely broken.

The 2017 report was released in February of 2019.  According to the report, Indiana has 18.2 per 1000 child abuse reports, behind only Kentucky at 22.3 per 1000. The national average is 10.

Here are a few findings from the report.The full report can be accessed here:
Child Maltreatment Report 2017 (Released Feb 2019)
■ The national rounded number of children who received a child protective services investigation response or alternative response increased 10.0 percent from 2013(3,184,000) to 2017 (3,501,000). 
■The number and rate of victims have fluctuated during the past 5 years. Comparing the national rounded number of victims from 2013 (656,000) to the national rounded number of victims in 2017 (674,000) shows an increase of 2.7 percent. 
■The 2017 data show three-quarters (74.9%) of victims are neglected, 18.3 percent are physically abused, and 8.6 percent are sexually abused. These victims may suffer a single maltreatment type or a combination of two or more maltreatment types. 
■For 2017, an estimated 1,720 children died of abuse and neglect at a rate of 2.32 per 100,000 children in the national population.1

So what is the answer to this dilemma and increasingly saddening state of our Union? This issue can only be combated one child at a time, one family at a time, along with increasing mental health services and drug addiction rehabilitation. If you suspect something, say something. We are all mandated reporters and are protected under the law as long as we are making the report in good faith and not purposely trying to falsely accuse someone. Here is the Child Abuse Hotline number: 1-800-422-4453.  Childhelp is another organization dedicated to informing and assisting those who need to understand abuse or report abuse. Click on this link to the website address: www.childhelp.org

Remember: If you suspect abuse you must call the hotline to report it. If you feel more comfortable calling a school counselor or a police officer, either can help make this call.

When Kids Go Missing

In my 23 years of being a school counselor, I can think of only four times that one of my students has run away or gone missing. In each case, these students show up within 24-48 hours. They usually just hide out a friend's house- for whatever reason.  Usually there are complicated family issues at bay. Kids don't realize that no matter what conflict they are having with their parent/s, their parent/s still love them. Dysfunction is a real thing for a lot of families. What kids also don't realize is that the things that have been happening to them, which in turn causes poor behavior and decisions, have over time made them confused individuals. Running from your problems is not a new concept. Kids running away has been an issue long before social media. Social media helps us find kids quicker and easier because sometimes they make posts or keep in touch with another person when they are missing.

Kids running away is also not a crime, if they are not committing crimes when they run away. It's often just a form of escape from their world. It's a very terrifying experience for a parent, whether or not the relationship is in crisis.  We can only hope that when a child returns from his or her disappearance that he or she gets the emotional help and support needed, instead of criticism and punishment.  Hopefully this student will be found and returned to his family soon.

Book Review: Bridging the Softskills Gap by Bruce Tulgan

It's no secret that today's job market is being flooded with Generation Y, known as the second wave of Millenials, born between 1990-1999. These recent graduates have a lot in common: they are technically saavy, grew up with helicopter parents, and google all of their "how-tos". They often relate well to adults but are missing key soft skills in three important areas: Professionalism, Critical Thinking, and Followership. This book describes these three qualities in detail, giving employers specific ideas as to how to teach these skills. Yes, it is often frustrating for employers, but these kids are well trained and up to date on the technical skills needed to run a company.

Managers complained that these young people lacked in the following areas: personal responsibility, work habits, checking devices on a regular basis, not being able to problem solve or defer to authority, and finally, greatly lack in teamwork.

In brief the categories addressed in this book of each area that employers can focus on and provide training to employees are as follows:
Professionalism- self-evaluation, personal responsibility, work habits, positive attitude and people skills
Critical Thinking- proactive learning, problem solving and decision making
Followership- respect for context, good citizenship, service and teamwork

In short, I recommend this book to high school teachers, college professors, and employers. Teachers and professors can use it in their classrooms and employers can use it in their training.  It is easy to read, practical and very clear and concise. There is a compatible workbook that can be purchased also. It is called Soft Skills Training: A Workbook to Develop Skills for Employment by Frederick Wentz.