Observations in School Counseling During Covid 2020

I have been gathering my thoughts about COVID and the school year we have had so far. I live in Indiana, just west of Indianapolis. Our Governor gave schools permission to be open, and our district has done an outstanding job. One of the most helpful things we did was give parents the opportunity to send students to school or to work at home. Our district designated a teacher at every grade level to be an at home instructor, so the classroom teachers could focus solely on the students who were present with them. Parents had the opportunity second semester to make that choice again- if they were at home, they could go to school, and if they were at school, they could switch to being at home. This helped many students who had sick family members.

I am the counselor at the alternative high school. Beginning in August we saw a shift in the students our two districts were sending us. Since we were all at home learners during March-May of 2020, many of those students got behind and didn't complete any work. Those students came to us and are getting caught up. They love the small environment and staff. We have 2 teachers for each core subject (Math, English, Science, and Social Studies), so we are really a miniature version of the main high schools. Our teacher to student ration is 1:16 or less. 

What we have noticed is that more and more students are becoming withdrawn and anxious during COVID. Students have admitted to me that once they were home for 6 months or more (starting in March), they got comfortable at home and were afraid to leave the house. Once these students gave us a chance and they began coming, they wanted to stay with us second semester. The main reason is that we are a small school and we have a caring staff. They also feel like they can be themselves at the alternative school. Everyone has a different story of why they come to us.

We need to remember that "People need people"- any amount of time we invest in someone else is worth the extra mile, the extra question, the extra compliment, the extra phone call, the extra e-mail. We find that our parents need support just as much as their students do. It's very simplistic, but it works. Students are wanting someone to look up to and listen to them even if they are quiet themselves. I have never had a student get mad at me for asking how their day is going or how I can help them. I have had students come back and say thank you. We must overcome our fears to help our students overcome theirs. This will reduce everyone's levels of anxiety. Isolation only breeds more depression and anxiety. Let's get back to the basics!

Mental Health: Same Issues, New Words Over Time

Recently I was walking around Barnes and Noble Bookstore and looking at the categories and titles of books. There were seven major sections of books that I could see: Health and Wellness, Cooking, Fitness, History, Finance, Psychology, and Religion.  I am amazed at how many books have been written to help us with our mental health. Of all those categories, five of them relate directly to mental health and how to improve our lives in some way.  I was imagining all the books written through the ages that weren't even on the bookshelves, but can be accessed electronically or in libraries.

Over the years, the field of Psychology comes up with new terms for the same issues. Here are some of them.
1980's  Self-Esteem
1990's  Positivity & Meditation
2000's  Self-Help
2010's  Self-Care and Mindfulness

Mental Health is an ageless issue in every culture. While we know that genetics, environment, spiritual mindset and personality all play a part in people's mental health (we are all on a spectrum!), no one has a magic answer to recovery, but collectively, we can narrow down remedies to some common things. Things that we know help improve mental health in various combinations:
A good diet, outdoor time in the sun, exercise, spirituality, medication (for some), counseling, de-stressing (taking yourself out of situations that cause stress- when possible), setting long term goals, and getting the required recommended amount of sleep.

Working with teenagers who have mental health issues, I am amazed at how many of them are already living poor lifestyles at their young ages. Most of them definitely are not getting enough sleep, they eat a terrible diet of french fries and hamburgers or chicken fingers several times a week, and rarely do they exercise once they have completed PE requirements. I personally think PE should be required every semester until graduation.  This is a major mental health booster!

It is definitely frustrating that students don't take care of themselves, and no matter how much advice I give them, I don't see major improvements in the short term. I spend a lot of time helping kids get across the finish line of K-12 education, and then I have to shoo them out the door and start over with the next generation.

I would say that over the years, I have found that pursuing relationships with kids and letting them know we care as counselors is the best we can do, while equipping them with tools and exposing them to opportunities that are out there after graduation. I believe that every connection helps them connect brain cells, and I want them to look back on high school and remember that someone cared, even if they don't remember my name!

The Heroes of the Battle: School Counselor Recognition Month

                                                       

February is National School Counselor recognition.While not wanting to trivialize actual soldiers in war, it often feels like we counselors are in the battle for the souls of children within our care 8 hours a day, and every one of us is a hero, although we would not think of ourselves that way. The Indiana Youth Institute collects data every year of the most serious and prevalent issues our school aged children face.  This year's findings suggested that the top issues in Indiana specifically are: poverty, teen suicide, depression, infant mortality, child abuse, increasing access to weapons, and relationship violence.
The full study can be obtained by clicking here: IYI 2017 Kids Count in Indiana Data Book

With the exception of infant mortality and increasing access to weapons, school counselors deal with the other issues on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis.  At my school I make an average of one CPS phone call, assess suicide, and assist in relationship violence or abuse every 2-3 months, and deal with effects of poverty, depression and relationship abuse on a daily basis. School counselors fight for the healthy minds and well being of our students.  This is on top of other regular responsibilities such as scheduling.

I believe many students, especially middle and high school aged, are suffering from a mental health crisis. I like this definition I found on the internet:

A mental health crisis is a non-life threatening situation in which an individual is exhibiting extreme emotional disturbance or behavioral distress, considering harm to self or others, disoriented or out of touch with reality, has a compromised ability to function, or is otherwise agitated and unable to be calmed.

We can spend a lot of time researching cause and effect, but the truth is, our schools are filled with students who are in constant distress about something. So many things contribute to this: family disturbance, genetic inheritance, social anxieties, academic pressures, relational abuse, and self-medicating practices. As school counselors, we must continue to advocate for a lower counselor to student ratio, social workers in the schools, and resilience to keep learning how to assist without giving up. Our youth are our future and we must continue to celebrate their successes and inspire hope for their futures. Continue to be heroes.

There Was an "Old" Woman Who Lived in a School

. . . She Had So Many Children, She Didn't Know What to Do!!

I feel like the old woman who lived in a shoe, but unlike her, I refuse to live out the nursery rhyme:

"she gave them some broth without any bread, then whipped them all soundly and put them to bed."

Instead, I'd like to rearrange the words a bit:

There was an "old" woman who lived in a school

She had so many children, she didn't know what to do

She gave them advice, to put in their head

Told them to eat well, and go early to bed.

I know that sounds silly, but I am at my wits end a lot of days with all the requests to come talk to me and not enough time to take care of each one. Unlike the old woman, I want to take care of each of their needs and requests. I don't have a simple solution or answer, when I have 345 students in my care, but I do view the students as my children while they are in the school building. I try to treat them as their parents would expect that I would, and in some cases, I try to treat them better!

There is a recommended ratio of 1 to 250 students, which would help tremendously if each school would follow that guideline, but unfortunately, it is an area where more money would be needed, and in this time of economic crisis, it is actually being taken away. Mental health issues among young people are on the rise and I am at a loss as to what the answer is. I only pray that each parent out there loves and cherishes his/her child so that the child doesn't need to see a school counselor. Idealistic, maybe. Realistic? I would say yes, it is realistic to expect that from parents. Actual? No, I think some parents are too overwhelmed and burdened trying to manage their own mental health that their children's often suffer, even if not intentionally.

For now, I will continue to feel like I have so many children I don't know what to do, and be glad that I have a job to go to every day where I can do what I can!

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

Business often increases in guidance and counseling offices across the country during the months of January and February. There is no doubt that some people suffer from what is now called Seasonal Affective Disorder, which in summary, is a lack of sunshine in their lives. The days are darker, colder, and just plain miserable at times. Symptoms often mirror those of depression: hopelessness, anxiety, loss of appetite, and oversleeping, among others. Instead of writing about it, I am including a link to the Mayo Clinic, who has a great article about it.
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/seasonal-affective-disorder/DS00195/DSECTION=symptoms

I guess the most important thing to remember if you or someone you know suffers from SAD is that you can get through it. My tips to my students that I talk to are these:
1. Get outside if possible, or sit by a sunny window in the house for a half hour each day.
2. Exercise
3. Get 8-9 hours of sleep each night
4. Read something you enjoy reading about
5. Watch funny TV shows or movies
6. Eat healthy
7. If you like to write, start a journal of your thoughts (or a blog like me!)
8. If you are spiritual, pray for the strength to get through the tough time