Look Up, Not Down

After a colleague pointed out to me that I sometimes lack confidence in myself, I began to think about what I do that makes me appear nonconfident. I noticed that I often look down at the ground or floor when walking or running, and I caught myself often with my shoulders slumped forward a little bit and not having good posture. What in the world is the reason for that, I wondered? I have always looked down at the road when I run to make sure I don't trip over something and fall or hurt myself. Or so I thought.

I took a jog the other day and I made conscious effort to look up at the sky, houses and trees. The sky was really pretty and I began to wonder how much I had missed out on in life from looking down. I began to think that because of things that happened to me in my younger years, I carried around a sense of  self-defeat, or low self-worth, and I think that looking down just became a way of life for me. 

I have never taken compliments well, although I have learned to respond with "thank you," instead of "nahhhh."  While I work hard to compliment others and smile at passersby and help others feel good about themselves (after all, that is my job!), I'm not sure I always believe in myself and my ability to really make a difference in others' lives.

I want to keep training myself to look up and see the beauty of life and others, instead of the dirty pavement. I want to pass this ability on to the middle school kids I work with. Perhaps if they can learn this habit earlier than I did, they will grow to be strong teenagers and adults who see beauty all around them.