Sunday, June 9, 2013

A School Counselor Tribute to Graduates

 
As a school counselor, I like to think that I had a huge impact on all my students. So much so, that at graduation I would get to give a special address to the class (please tell me I'm not the only school counselor who has had this thought). Since I will never draw rank among the board members, principals, or famous graduates who get to shake hands and hand out diplomas, I will write my own speech and post it here . . . . 

Graduates of the Class of 2013:

There are not a whole lot of things you will remember about your actual education, but there will be a lot of things you will remember surrounding those time blocks of Math, English, and other time filling classes that build brain cells.  I would like to try to capture a few things from each grade level that may be humorous, or may be sad, and conclude with a few words of encouragement to push you on to the next venture in your life.

In elementary school,  you may remember that you had to line up in a straight line and BE QUIET in the halls, or you would have to go back to the room and start all over again. Or you may remember that your parents divorced, or that your teacher was really pretty, or that the kid who budged in front of you at the drinking fountain was declared the school bully. You made sure everyone knew about it, and no one forgot about it until the poor kid was in 9th grade, when no one cared about what group he was a member of anymore. In elementary school you remember the little things, here and there, that stick in your mind, and you are never exactly sure why it was THAT particular thing you remembered. It could have been getting your art drawing in the art show, or getting to take a paper to the office.  For me, it was being the only girl who played kickball with the boys in 4th grade, and I loved how I could kick it far and high and the boys respected me, and when I was in the outfield, I could catch the high balls for the final "out," so we could go up and kick again.

In middle school, there is much to forget and not much any of us ever want to remember. Your best memories of middle school might be the girls fighting like they were sisters who wanted to disown each other, or boys trying to get a girls' attention, or awkwardly getting a note that says, "I think about you all the time, you come to me in my dreams and I can't get you out of my mind."  The cafeteria might be the most memorable place, where you threw grapes and baby carrots across the table when the supervisors had their backs turned, or you might be the kid who brought a book to lunch every day and, despite the loud decibles all around you, managed to picture yourself as the main character in the story.  For me, it was two girls following my sister and I around the halls calling us the B word, because my sister liked a boy they liked, and he liked her instead of them. I was a victim of bullying by association.

In high school, there is much you want to remember and hold on to forever. Making the school musical, or a special choir, or making varsity as a freshman or sophomore. It might be finding  your first boyfriend or girlfriend that you considered "real."  It might be finally thinking about your grades and how important they are in getting into certain colleges. High school also meant finding some true friends, and sticking with them through graduation.  For me, high school was a combination of a lot of things that you might be able to relate to: Ending my journey of foster homes I was in since the age of 8 months, running on the Cross Country team, making the editor in chief of my yearbook staff, and being in a musical, just to see what it was like. Finally, getting accepted to a college I wanted to attend.

Now, for what I WANT you to remember.  I want you to remember that your teachers and counselors cared about you. Even the crabby ones. Don't your parents crab at you? We crab at the ones we care about.  I also want you to remember that you don't have to live your adult life as if you were stuck in middle school. Many adults do, but it doesn't have to be that way. Remember also that love does cover a multitude of offenses. When we smile more, forgive more, and reach out more, we don't have as much time to be oppositional and critical of others or ourselves.  Finally, don't let bad memories of the past ruin or paralyze your ability to use your talents in the present and future. Talents that you have, that will benefit others when used wisely and carefully.

Thank you, class of 2013 for enriching my life and letting me get to know you and watch you mature and develop into young adults. If you see me in public some day, please say hi.

Sincerely, Mrs. Popenfoose